Know When to Say When
by Jennifer Hoffman
Do you feel that you have to see every situation through to a successful conclusion, that somehow it has to work out and everyone has to be happy? Do you define the success of your lessons by how long you stay in them or whether, through your efforts, someone's behavior will change? How long does this take and when is it appropriate and right to walk away? The criteria that you use to determine the success of each lesson will establish the point where you know that it is right to say that you have had enough, and you know when to say 'when.'
It is easy to believe that a successful outcome of any lesson is one where every issue is resolved and all parties walk away from the situation happy, fulfilled and glad to have been part of a life-changing experience. But that often is not the case. There are often issues that have no resolution other than to help you reclaim your power. These lessons are your most difficult, your most challenging because they are the ones where your struggle will be between staying out of a sense of commitment and obligation and leaving things unfinished, meaning you were not able to change someone's opinion or behavior and resolve the situation in a way that you feel comfortable with.
If it is your belief that every situation has a positive resolution, i.e. everyone lives 'happily ever after' then you risk being in situations far longer than you need to. And you also risk missing the point of the lesson, which has to do with your own learning and soul growth. Does that include leading someone else to happiness? You can only take them as far as they are able to go. Each person has to put forth some effort in their life and often no matter how appealing the opportunities that you have to offer are, they may not be able to embrace them.
The challenge is to reconcile what you believe is your obligation to others as part of your spiritual journey with your own need for joy and peace. When situations bring you only pain, sadness and despair, it is an indicator to you that the lesson may include knowing when you have had enough. What are your expectations about how a situation must end and what your obligations to others are? These are boundaries that you must set for yourself so that you know when you have had enough and when it is appropriate for you to find your power and walk away.
Copyright(c) 2004-5 by Jennifer Hoffman. All Rights Reserved.